Can I Take His Place?
An atoorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of the upmost urgency. An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor. “So, what is it?” grumbled the governor Judge Garber has just died” said the attorney “and I want to take his place” The governor replied; [...]
Carpentry errors. . .
A carpet-layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he’d lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ‘No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,’ he said to himself. He proceeded to get [...]
Chicken at the movies
An old guy approaches the window of the movie theater with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him. He replies, “Well, my pet chicken, of course!” The girl tells him that he CAN’T take a chicken into the [...]
Chocolate Sundae Options
One day a boy was going to a fancy dress party, he was going as a cowboy. He had his hat, his vest, his boots and his two guns. On the way to the fancy dress party he decided to get a chocolate sundae with nuts on the top. So he said to the lady [...]
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