Make Fun » old age jokes

Luxurious resident

make fun — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 14:57:44 +0000

The world’s top luxury cruise ship “Queen Elizabeth II” is about to retire, this news make American 89-year-old lady Beatrice very anxious. Eight years ago, Beatrice sold all assets and go into life on board, and become a the only “permanent resident.”on the luxury cruise ship.Although Beatrice spend about 3500 pounds for the living every [...]

The Punt & the Geezer

make fun — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 05:04:02 +0000

A young punk gets on the cross town bus and sits down in the only vacant seat, directly across from an old man.The young punk has spiked, multi-colored, green, purple, and orange hair. His clothing is a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he’s without shoes. His entire face and body [...]

Back to Front

make fun — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 02:05:20 +0000

A young wanna-be stud is vactioning alone in Hawaii. He hits the beach, hoping to meet some young ladies. Much to his surprise, they all seem to be drawn to an old guy a little further down the shoreling. Our friend goes back to the hotel, hoping for better luck that night in a night-club. [...]

One for Me, One for You

make fun — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 02:05:01 +0000

There was a huge nut tree by the cemetery fence. One day two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. “One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me,” said one boy. The bucket was so full, several [...]

Old Age Smoking

make fun — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 02:04:40 +0000

Two old ladies, Sunny and Tina, were outside their nursing home having a smoke, when it started to rain. Tina pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking. Sunny: “What’s that?”Tina: “A condom.”Sunny: “Where’d you get it?”Tina: “You can get them at any chemist”The next day, Sunny [...]

Golf Challenge

make fun — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 02:04:19 +0000

A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee [...]

Gunshot Wound

make fun — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:39:02 +0000

Aging Mildred was a 93 year old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl’s old Army pistol and made the [...]

Church Service

make fun — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:38:33 +0000

One Sunday morning, the priest saw little Davey staring up at the large plaque that hung in the church’s foyer. The plaque was covered with names and small American flags were mounted on either side of it.“Father Donovan,” the boy asked, “what is this?“Well, son, it’s a memorial to all the young men and women [...]

Sharing Everything

make fun — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 11:38:23 +0000

A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald’s. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then [...]

The Vase

make fun — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 09:04:35 +0000

A guy goes to a girl’s house for the first time, and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks, and as he’s standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up, and as he’s [...]